Hello! I am glad you’ve stumbled upon my blog! My name is Charis M. Rooks and this blog will serve as a safe place, a haven of sorts, where I can share my stories with you, the reader. I will share my triumphs, I will share my struggles, and I will above all share my truth no matter how difficult it may be. I want nothing more than to tell you the stories that have made me the person I am today and perhaps give you a place to share your thoughts as well.
Loneliness After Divorce
Everyone has seen popular game shows like the Price is Right—ever wonder why they look out into the audience asking the person they came with if they should spin again even though they have 90 points already?
In everyday situations, most people would not spin again, but in these cases, most do try for that slim 10 points, on the off chance that they can win big.
Divorce is somewhat like that final spin of the wheel. Even though it may not be the smartest thing to get out there and start spinning that wheel again, many people are pushed to it by feelings of loneliness, ineptitude, or just not being good enough.
In this case, most people do not have someone in the audience telling them to spin again or stick with what they have got.
Instead, they have a pit in their stomach that tells them they do not want to be alone. In my early days after the divorce, the voice of loneliness was calling my name.
It was telling me “spin the wheel again, come on you can do it.”
So how did I respond?
You guessed it, I started dating and serial dating at that, so I technically spun the wheel several times and associated myself with foolishness and not wisdom.
Now my goal wasn’t to be in a relationship with anyone, it was quite opposite.
I just had this urge or sense I needed to feel wanted and the sense that someone wanted me.
So with that in mind, I wanted to pick up a phone and talk to a man, or call him up and go out when that feeling came.
Loneliness is crippling feelings that can make people do things they never thought they would do.
For most, it takes time to realize that the feelings of loneliness are not pushing you to go out and find someone, but rather to turn to Jesus and his comfort.
In the early days of divorce, it may feel like you’ve got things wired up wrong, then Jesus rings the doorbell, but you go for the phone thinking that the only thing that will make you feel better is another person.
It’s time ladies that we rewire ourselves to understand our needs will be provided for from one source, which is God.
If you do not take anything out of this devotional today please take this with you. Your loneliness can not be fulfilled by a person.
I repeat YOUR LONELINESS CANNOT BE FULFILLED BY ANY PERSON.
Please set boundaries and do not associate with men on intimate levels out of loneliness after your divorce.
Otherwise, you are the becoming the game contestant that spins the wheel again when you have 90 points out of 100, and no one else is spinning behind you.
Proverbs 3:24 When you lie down, you will not be afraid; when you lie down, your sleep will be sweet.
Charis is passionate about speaking the truth and working to spread the word of God and its healing power. In addition to founding Divorce Recovery Advocates for Women INC., Charis is the Editor in Chief /CEO of Inspired Grace Media Productions and founder of Inspired Grace Ministries.Charis served in the Celebrate Recovery Ministry (locally) for 9 years in which 5 years were dedicated to serving as an CR Training Coach and CR Pastor. Charis currently serves as Lead Discipleship and Prayer Pastor at Inspired Grace International Ministries.
Charis is teacher of the word, testimonial speaker, divorce recovery facilitator, certified life coach, and celebrated author.
For more information or for more devotionals to help you through your divorce, visit us at where we are ready, waiting, and willing to help.